The Culvers Gulch Butt Kicking Contest

The Culvers Gulch Butt Kicking Contest

(The day Todd Cotton really got his butt kicked)
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He may have been almost twenty, handsome and athletic but Todd Cotton remained a spoilt brat.
Widely disliked and resented by his neighbours in Culvers Gulch, Todd was cause of 90% of the unpleasantness which occurred in that otherwise idyllic little Mid Western town.  If anyone was going to beat up on the younger boys or play loud music late at night it would be Todd and if anything got stolen, there was a good chance Todd Cotton knew where it was.
By the time Todd had turned nineteen but had already fathered and abandoned three children by three separate local girls and written off two of the cars, which he had previously used to terrorize and tear up the neighbourhood.
Good looking, but, arrogant, rude and inconsiderate Todd would have topped any poll of the people who’s butt most of the Culvers Gulch community would dearly love to kick.   Ass luck would have it (or bad luck on Todd’s part) on one hot July afternoon some of they got their wish.

………………………..

Todd was bored, he had broken up with his latest girlfriend, run out of smokes and as he had forgotten to put oil or break fluid in his car the damn thing had stopped working.  As a result he had  nothing to do, except study and he sure didn’t want to do that.

“Fuck!” he thought, even his over indulgent father would be unlikely to buy him yet another car!
It was also really gaddamn hot, he pulled off his vest and chucked it onto the car seat. Then, like some sulky over grown child Todd was moodily kicking a ball around the garden trying to figure out some way of making money, when, with one careless kick, he sent the ball flying over the fence into his neighbour ‘s garden.
“Damn!” he thought, “if those fags find the ball they’ll complain to Dad about me ….. again!”

 

He climbed over the fence and saw that the ball had landed right in the middle of a square of newly laid, and still wet. cement.”Shit, they will not like that!” he thought “I better get it out of there quick”.  He glanced around furtively to check that nobody had seen him.
Getting the ball would be easier said than done, it had landed near the middle of the square and would be difficult to get hold of without walking on the cement and potentially getting stuck.
     
kneeling on the edge of the cement, Todd stretched out his arm but the ball was still just beyond his reach, so he attempted to lean further forward over the wet cement.  He had almost grasped the ball when he lost his balance and began falling forward, instinctively reaching out with his left hand to break his fall. His hand landed heavily in the cement, and the weight of his muscular young body, increased by the impact of his fall pushed it deep into the gunky substance.
“Shit!” he thought “well, I guess the damage is done, I better get the ball and get out of here” With an act of stupidity which would have embarrassed Dumb and Dumber’s slower cousin Dumbest Todd allowed the hand which was now deep in the cement to take his weight he again leaned forward towards the ball
At that moment with a resounding “THUDD!!”something hard, blunt and painful landed across the seat of his jeans “AAAAOOOWW!” he yelled in pain “… what the f….?”
“Look what you’ve done, you little jerk!” snarled Buster Nolan still brandishing the heavy metal spade with which he had just struck Todd’s behind “I spent all morning laying that cement!”
Todd look back over his shoulder and saw, to his horror, not only was Buster holding a spade, but his partner Stuart was menacingly clutching a rifle!  “He’s not going to shoot me is he?” wondered a now rather scared Todd.
“Didn’t you just know it would be the neighbourhood thug who did the damage!” growled Stuart “Someone should really kick his butt!”
“Get out of there!” shouted Buster “Let me see how much damage you have done!”
“It was an accident” protested Todd “Okay, okay, I am going!” however, at the moment he spoke  he discovered that, in fact, he couldn’t go anywhere.  In the few moments during which Todd’s hand had been in the damp cement  it had begun to set and had now hardened around his hand holding him trapped with a deathly grip.          
“Oh fuck!” he gasped “I’m stuck!”
“What?” demanded Buster “Let me see! Are you kidding me?” he grabbed hold of Todd’s hand and  attempted to pull it free, only to discover that Todd was, for once telling the truth and he was indeed stuck fast in the cement.
“AAOOW!” yelled Todd as the cement gripped his skin as if it would tear it off if Buster pulled his arm any harder.
Buster let go of Todd’s arm and stood back, it seemed Todd was indeed held a virtual prisoner in the quickly drying cement.  He looked down at the boy and suddenly noticed how appealing and vulnerable his neighbour’s wayward son looked, kneeling and trapped in a most undignified positionwith his 19 year old butt sticking high in the air.  There was no denying that Todd Cotton was hot, he might be a total jerk, a thief, a homophobic bully and an altogether unpleasant human being, but he was still a fucking hot piece of ass.
Buster had spent many nights fantasizing about Todd Cotton’s ass, and all those fantasies involved inflicting pain on it in some way or another, and now that same ass was at his mercy.
He turned to Stuart “What was that you said someone should do to this little douche bag?” he asked.
“When?”
“Just now, you said someone should ……..?”
“I said someone should kick his ass!” relied Stuart a grin bursting out on his ruggedly handsome face “Someone should kick his ass good!!”    
 
“Yup! and what better time than now?!!”
 
Buster knelt down and removed Todd’s designer trainers, just in case the kid started doing the kicking himself once his realised what was planned.
However, Todd was not that bright “What are you doing?” he snapped “Get me outa’ here you fuckin’ faggot!!”
“I’m stripping you Toddy boy!” smiled  Buster as her undid Todd’s belt “You’re going to be our entertainment for the afternoon, for once we WE are going to have fun at YOUR expense!”   He paused for dramatic effect before adding “Now lets have a look at your butt!”
“WAA?…. fuck off you fa….!! yelled Todd

His protests were in vain, however, as, with a well practised movement, Buster pulled down the outraged youth’s jeans to reveal his bare 19 year old bottom. To Buster’s delight Todd’s butt was every bit as hot as he had always imagined.  It was the firm, round and athletic buttocks of an athletic young adult  yet still covered with the tender, hairless pink skin of a boy.  A lighter shade than the rest of Todd’s tanned and golden skin and framed by a new white jockstrap, it was presented to him like the ultimate gourmet feast, spread slightly, by virtue of Todd’s undignified pose to reveal a glimpse of a puckering, tight and 100% guaranteed straight boy virgin rosebud.
Buster struggled to suppress a gasp, for he had just exposed the boy butt of every gay sadist’s wildest imaginings  “Hey! Cute butt Kid!” he chuckled, and he meant it.
Watching the scene, Stuart grinned, well aware of his boyfriend’s proclivities, and sharing them to some degree, he knew they were in for some fun that afternoon.
It certainly did not feel like fun from where Todd was kneeling“Fuck you!” he spat, mortified by the humiliation of showing his bare butt to two gay men, whilst beginning to feel very nervous about the vulnerability of his position, and what Buster and Stuart might be planning to do to him. It began to dawn on him that it might be wise not to be quite so rude to them!
“Ha Ha!” he attempted not to sound as nervous as he felt”Good joke, but please guys pull my pants back up and help me get unstuck! ….uh …. guys?”
“No chance Toddy!” sneered Stuart “We’ve got you exactly where we want you … where we can do as we ….. um ….. please with you!”
Todd looked back over his shoulder “ You’re not gonna’ ..f…f … You’re not gonna’ fuck me …are you?” his voice was suddenly almost shrill.
“No Todd” replied Buster as he proceeded to pull their captive’s jeans right off and sling them to one side before delivering a stinging slap to Todd’s upturned behind “But we are going to fuck you up!”
“After what we have planned for you, you’ll wish we did fuck you asshole!” laughed Stuart
“Speaking of assholes” murmured Buster as he took Todd’s butt cheeks in his hands and parted them to reveal the tight little anus between.  “I have another plan for that” he thought to himself, allowing his forefinger to tickle the puckering pink rim.
Todd was speechless with horror and humiliation, a fucking homo had just parted his ass cheeks and touched him butt hole.  How did a guy get over shame like that?!! for a moment he wished the cement would open up and swallow him whole, rather than just his hand.  
Finally releasing his grip on Todd’s bottom,  Buster stood up and took hold of the “Keep Off” sign, which Todd had stupidly chosen to ignore, pulled it out of the hole it was in and walked away towards his garage.  At the same time Stuart turned and walked to the gate and out onto the street.
By now Todd was a very unhappy young homophobe, as he knelt trapped in cement, naked except for a bare butt revealing jockstrap, the words “What we have planned for you” ringing in his now throbbing head. He struggled to free his hand, but it was held as in a vice.
As he had demonstrated a number of times that day Todd was not the brightest Jock in town, and on that day, he was not the luckiest either.  Without thinking he pushed his free hand hard onto the cement in order to gain the extra balance needed to extricate his trapped hand. Sadly for Todd different parts of the cement had dried at different speeds, and he had chosen to push against an area which was still quite damp, so his free hand sunk straight in.
So intent was Todd in his attempts to liberate his left hand, he did not immediately realize that his  right hand was now encased in the same glue like  mixture which was grasping his left, nor that  his  very struggles were embedding it even more firmly.  By the time the slow rolling penny did drop, it was too late, the remaining damp cement had dried and he was now held prisoner, trapped not just by one hand, but by both.  As the awful realization hit him he howled in anguished fury “NO… AWWWW ..FUCKING ….NO! …SHIT …NO!!”
“What a total bone brained Doofus you are Toddy!” chortled Buster, returning from the garage, carrying a large blank sign and a pot of red paint “Now you are really fucked! … and you did it yourself”
As Todd watched him with a combination of impotent fury and mounting terror, Buster inserted the new sign into the hole from which he had take the first sign, then he opened the paint pot and painted the words “BUTT KICKING CONTEST” across the sign 

 

“What?” stammered an incredulous, and now really frightened Todd    “W… What does that mean?”
“What part of BUTT KICKING CONTEST don’t you understand Todd?” grinned Buster “That’s your butt” he pointed first to Todd’s quivering bare bottom and then to his boot clad foot “.. and  we’re going to kick it!”  he paused enjoying the look of horrified awakening spreading slowly across Todd’s handsome but sweat beaded face before adding “Correction, … in fact the whole town is going to kick your butt!”            
At that moment Stuart returned followed by a group of young men from the local neighbourhood, all of whom had reason to dislike Todd and all of whom were obviously delighted at the sight of the neighbourhood bully’s humiliating, vulnerable and bare assed predicament.
“Hey Todd” called Bobby McCullin, who had lost two teeth back in March when they came into contact with Todd Cotton’s fist “Great pose, I was looking for somewhere to park my pedal bike!”
“Cute asshole, Asshole!” snarled Buck Duffy who’s sixteen year old sister had once accused Todd of date rape, only to withdraw the claim after she “accidentally” fell down some stairs at the town school house.    
“Howdy friends” smiled Buster “Welcome to the Culvers Gulch Butt Kicking Contest!”
The crowd erupted in cheers, applause, “Whoops” and guffaws, clearly the prospect of kicking Todd Cotton’s booty appealed to every man present.
A BUTT KICKING CONTEST???!!” screamed Maurice Tuttle, whom Todd had bullied since junior school “Now you are talking Mister Nolan!!”
“That pink boy bottom, is just SO inviting the toe ‘o my boot!”sniggered Ashley Swires who’s much loved 1965 Buick LeSabre  had ended up as a smoking pile of metal after being forced off the road and into a ravine by a drunken Todd Cotton last Halloween “I broke two teeth and an arm in that crash!” thought Ashley “But, thank the Lord, My legs are perfect working order!”
Todd could not believe what he was hearing, at any other time these  wimps and homos would pay for what they had just said, but unfortunately he was in no position to get his hands on anyone.  For once the boot was on the other foot, in fact there were boots on lots of feet, and they were really gong to kick his ass!
The abject humiliation of being trapped with his bare ass pointing at a group of laughing guys was dulled only by the mounting terror at what he was hearing.
“Like most people in town” continued Buster,  “Everyone here has a very good reason to kick Todd Cotton’s  little bare tush, indeed kicking the tail of a piece of work like Todd is a public duty for any civic minded citizen” he stepped forward, warming to his theme “Today after Todd in his usual inconsiderate manner, wrecked a morning’s hard work and two thousand bucks worth of cement, we have been presented with a God Given opportunity to do a public service, and I for one believe we would be mightily remiss were we to let that opportunity pass us by!”.    
“We’re with you on that boss!” laughed Buck “So how does this Butt Kicking Contest work?”
“That’s simple, each contestant gets to give young Cotton here’s tail one hard kick, and the one who gets him hollerin’ the loudest wins the prize!!”  
The group of men all nodded with enthusiastic approval “Sounds good ” said one “but what’s the prize?”
Buster paused, he hadn’t thought that far “Um .. his jeans, the winner gets the honor of burning the little jerk’s jeans, because one thing’s for certain, he’s going home nekid!!”
This produced another burst of whoops, cheers and jeers from the crowd. At which Stuart leaned over and whispered in Buster’s ear, “Careful Buddy they could kill him!”
Buster nodded and beckoned the crowd into a close huddle so he could whisper at a level Todd could not hear, albeit he strained to do so.  “Look guys, the point of this contest is to give the scumbag a very sore and bruised butt, which he won’t be able to sit on for a few weeks, so that he learns his lesson, not to cripple him or leave any permanent injury.  After all ..” he added “..we want that butt back pretty and pink the next time we kick it!!  Is that clear?”
The men all nodded their assent, some more reluctantly than others.  They all understood the point was to bruise Todd Cotton’s but not to break it.  However, there was no need to tell him that!
“Never break your toys” added Stuart “You may want to play with them again”
All grinning broadly the men lined up behind their target, at which point a desperate, and now fear sweat drenched, Todd  began to beg for his bottom.
“Please guy, don’t do this PLEASE!! …. I won’t be a jerk any more …. PLEASE DON’T ….PLEASE!” the last word ended in a sob, to the delight of his erstwhile victims.

Ignoring Todd’s pleas, Stuart was the first to take his turn, he walked up behind Todd, raised his leg and then swung it forward, his shiny black leather boot delivering a glancing blow to its tender pink target. He then had the satisfaction of watching the first red mark spread across Todd’s butt cheek.
AAAGGHH!!” Yelled Todd “AAAOOOOWWWW!!! please stop!  No more! PLEASE!!”
Sadly for Todd, his past behavior had been such that the people of Culvers Gulch were well past feeling any sympathy for him, and his young bottom was now paying a painful price for every inconsiderate, arrogant, violent and criminal act he had inflicted on the town.
Like most bullies, who enjoyed inflicting pain on weaker victims, he had a very low tolerance of pain himself, and he had never known pain like that kick before. However, he would soon know that same pain again, and worse,                
Buck Duffy took his turn next, adopting a mock ‘gangsta’ strut as he approached his target with no attempt to disguise the pleasure kicking Cotton’s hiney would give him.  “This is for my sister you fuck!” he hissed lashing out with his trainer clad foot.
Todd attempted to dodge, but it was an ill judged move, Buck had aimed for the left buttock, but Todds swift movement resulted in the foot landing squarely and painfully in the delicate area right between this cheeks.
“YYIIIIIEEEEEEOOOOWWW!” screamed Todd, tears spilling from his clenched shut eyes “That  ..AAAAAOOOW …hurt ….you… you …” the next word was lost in a sob.

Maurice took his turn next, a gentle soul by nature, his kick lacked the strength and aggression of the previous two men, but the smooth sole of his Italian leather pump landed right on the hyper sensitive spot where Stuart’s boot mark was already forming a bruise, giving Maurice the immense satisfaction of hearing his long term abuser scream and cry in pain.

Bobby McCullin’s kick was far less gentle “That’s for the teeth you owe me!” he cried as his rubber soled foot connected with the now openly sobbing Todd. Right butt cheek with a resounding THUD!  
As Ashley watched the surreal but hilarious, and somewhat arousing scene, and waited his turn, he regretted his decision to wear open sandals that day and briefly wondered if he had time to run home and put on  the combat boots he had kept over from his brief period of military service.  Like the rest of the men present, Ashley was not normally a cruel person,  However, Todd Cotton had been a thorn in the side of Culvers Gulch for so long that kicking his teen aged bottom seemed like a just and fair comeuppance.
Buster watched as well, but, oddly some might think, he did not a turn in kicking Todd, he had the instincts of a sadist, but his tastes were more subtle, his pleasure came from watching and orchestrating events and ensuring that a victims ego suffered every bit as his body parts.  He glanced up at the security camera filming the scene and grinned to himself.  Young Todd was going to feel the sting of that afternoon’s humiliation long after his bruises had healed.  Turning, he made his way back to the garage to collect the discarded “Keep Off” sign.
Ashley, and two other men had taken their turns to kick Todd’s now very sore and bruised behind when a deep voice rang out from by the gate  “Can anyone join in the fun fella’s?
Despite the throbbing pain in his battered rump, Todd recognized the voice instantly and his blood ran cold.  A furtive glance towards where the voice had come confirmed his worst fears, the solid figure in denim overalls and heavy black boots, was instantly recognizable, and, from Todd’s current position, terrifying.  Joachim Buttowski had the distinction of being the only man in Culvers Gulch to have ever spanked Todd Cotton. It had happened three years ago, when Buttowski had caught the then sixteen year old Todd stealing copper wire from his yard,  hoping to sell it for drugs and beer.
The older man had thrown the swearing and protesting Todd over his shoulder, carried him into the house, where he had pulled down the furious youth’s jogging bottoms, forced him over his knee, and spanked his bare bottom with an old wooden bath brush for a good ten minutes.
Before today, that spanking had been the worst pain Todd had ever experienced, he had also found it  totally humiliating and seethed with hatred for Buttowski for weeks afterwards.  He had got his revenge thought, not on Buttowski himself, but on his dog, an act which suddenly did not seems as clever now as it had at the time.
Joachim looked at Todd Cotton’s already well kicked backside but his thoughts were of another sore rump, that of his beloved dog Tadzio, peppered with buckshot, he thought of the weeks of pain the poor animal had to suffer as it was nursed back to health, and of the large veterinary bills he had willingly paid to save his pet’s life.
He had always known it was Todd who had shot the dog, as revenge for the spanking, but he had never been able to prove it to the satisfaction of the police department.  So the little creep had got away with it …….. until now!
“Hi Joc!” replied Stuart, intrigued by the look on the new arrival’s face”Yes, of course, there is always room for a late entrant!”
“Good!” grinned Joachim “I’ve been waiting to do this for a long while!”
As his sworn enemy took up his position behind him, Todd panicked, knowing what was in store “Please don’t Mr. Buttowski Sir!” he squealed “I didn’t mean to shoot your dog …. I mean … it wasn’t me, …I didn’t shoot the mutt at all….!! PLEASE don’t!   PLEASE!!”    

By that slip of the tongue Todd had now condemned himself from his own mouth, and Joachim had no hesitation in letting him have the full force of his boot with all the anger and strength he could muster.  THUDDD!!!  the heavy working boot connected with the Cotton kid’s already bruised and sensitized behind with such force that, had Todd not already been rooted in concrete, he would have been sent flying quite a few feet forward.
The punished hunk’s agonized scream of anguish  echoed around the back yard and set dogs barking for streets around, nothing in his nineteen years had prepared him for such pain and, within moments, he was bawling like a baby .
As Joachim Buttowski  appeared to be getting into position to deliver a second kick, Stuart hastily stepped forward, he realised the late entrant had not been present when Buster had urged moderation, and it was clear that many more kicks like that first one would leave Todd scarred for life.
“Gentlemen!” he cried “I think we have a winner!  That was certainly the loudest holler of the afternoon!!” He scooped up Todd’s jeans and pushed them into the bemused Buttowski’s hands “These are now yours, enjoy burning them!”
It was then that Buster returned carrying the ‘Keep Off, sign and a small wooden mallet, he knelt beside Todd, took hold of his hair and looked into his blotchy and tear stained face. “Have you learnt your lesson Todd?”
Todd’s response was a mournful grunt.
“And what does the sign say?”
“…’Keep off’. ..sniff …Sir …. it says ‘Keep Off’”
“That’s right, but you ignored it didn’t you? so now I’m going to reinforce the message, so its really … um … implanted !” he stood up, walked behind Todd and placed the foot of the pole firmly between his painful and bruised butt cheeks pressing hard against the teen’s anus, as he did so grinning at the audible gasp of horror from Todd.
Buster then took the wooden mallet and tapped the top of the sign, causing the pole to bump hard against the tight portal like a battering ram’s first tentative assault on a castle gate.
YAAAHHHH!!” yelled Todd in resistance to he unaccustomed and unwelcome sensation. He attempted to clench his ass as much as he could, but the bruising to his cheeks made this particularly painful

‘TAP!  TAP!’ Buster hit the sign a little harder, and this time the petals of  The Cotton Kid’s rosebud began to part.  “Tap Tap Thwapp” and the pole forced its way past the resisting barrier.  Three more taps and a full inch of the cold hard metal pole had invaded Todd’s most private of body parts.
By now the group of men were weak with laughter, this was the most fun they had experienced in years, they would never have thought that watching handsome arrogant Todd Cotton being punished, humiliated and now degraded in such a manner would give them so much pleasure.  The more he was hurt, the more they cheered, the more he was humiliated the greater their delight. All of them would secretly remember this day with pleasure, and varying degrees of guilt for years to come.
Buster continued to apply the mallet to the sign with progressively increasing vigour, hammering it, inch by inch further into the still tight and unyielding passage, listening with ever growing pleasure to Todd’s cries and yelps of anguish.  He was careful to hit hard enough to cause discomfort, but not hard enough to cause damage.
Finally he stopped when he judged that just short of eight inches of the pole was inside Todd. He let go of the sign, and, to his delight, and the cheers of those watching, it remained in situ firmly pointing upwards at a roughly 35 degree angle.  Todd’s body was so tense and his rectum so tight that it had involuntarily clamped itself firmly round the pole, holding it in place, rather like a flag pole stuck firmly into its base.
Buster knelt down and whispered into Todd’s ear “Now you really are fucked Todd”. He said.

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Epilogue
It took two chuckling workmen with jack-hammers almost two hours to break a section of the cement  surrounding Todd’s hands away from the rest of the square. Two hours during which Todd coughed and spluttered in a  cloud of cement dust while being constantly pelted with flying grit.
Meanwhile his entire rear end was zone of constant throbbing pain, made worse by the fact, despite efforts by Stuart and others to remove it, the ‘Keep off’ sign remained stubbornly embedded in his rectum between his bruised and well kicked butt cheeks, as if it had now become a permanent tail. The discomfort and humiliation adding many levels to his abject misery
The cost of the workmen, together for the damage to Buster and Stuart’s cement would be born by Todd’s father, who turned up shortly afterwards.  He was none too pleased, and he was even less so when the locals started telling him some home truths about his spoilt and over indulged son  
             
Finally Todd was free from the cement, but if he thought things could not get any worse, he was sadly mistaken.  He was still attached to a large chunk of concrete which would need to be removed  in the ER room at the local hospital. Due to the size of the concrete slab, the only way to get Todd to hospital, or so Buster assured him, was kneeling in the back of  Joachim Buttowski’s pick up truck. his Bare kicked ass on full public display with the ‘Keep Off’ sign, which would also need medical attention to remove it still stuck there like a painful and embarrassing antenna.
Taking his cue from Buster, Joachim took what he insisted would would be the quickest route to the hospital,would be through the centre of town,. Unfortunately, as they would later claim, both he and Buster had forgotten that it was the weekend of the Culvers Gulch carnival, they also claimed not to have noticed the large sheet of paper bearing the message “Todd Cotton got his BUTT KICKED” which someone had attached to the back of the pickup.
It took them over an hour to get through town and at one point they got caught up in the parade driving up Main street between floats and a marching band at maximum speed of six miles per hour, allowing everyone in the cheering crowd with a camera or mobile phone to record Todd’s shame for posterity.        
Grinning medics at the hospital eventually succeeded in removing the sign from Todd’s rectum, but not before he had been through an ordeal so uncomfortable and embarrassing that he would wake up in a sweat dreaming about it for years to come.

As for his hands, they would remain bandaged for weeks, making it impossible for Todd to jack off or rub his sore bottom.  The latter was unfortunate, as Todd’s Dad, having finally become aware of Todd’s bad behaviour resolved to make up for his past lack of fatherly responsibility by the frequent and lengthy application of a hard hairbrush, belt or slipper to his son’s still very tender and bruised bare bottom.
It was well into the Fall before Todd could sit down in comfort.
Todd’s hands finally healed and his cute bottom eventually returned to its unmarked smooth and pink perfection.  However, the town made sure that his smarting ego continued to suffer for months ahead, this was made even worse when Buster uploaded the film from his security camera to YouTube and it became an internet sensation.

After Todd Cotton first saw the video he hid in his room for days it was then he discovered that his shame would never end after the day he got his butt kicked went viral.

    The End….

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New Blog Design

Thanks to those who expressed a view about the recent change to the blog design. The results were very close.

Of those who used the reactions buttons the result was 16 in favor of the rather lively blog wallpaper and 15 against, however, when adding in this who left a comment, all of whom felt the wall paper was too distracting and over powering, those who did not like the new design moved into the lead.

I also agree that the wallpaper was “too much”

I have, therefore compromised and converted the wallpaper into a new blog header, and given the overall blog a more subdued but (I think) stylist appearance.

I may experiment with a variety of themes going forward, until I find one I like.

New Blog Design

Hi Guys

I would be interested to know what you think of the revised blog design. I suspect it might be a bit distracting but please let me know what you think , either by leaving a comment or by using the “Reactions buttons below this post

Please use the buttons to indicate your view as follows:

Funny: Means you like the new design and find it amusing

Hot: Means you like the new design and find it sexy

Boring: Means you don’t like the new design

Too Extreme: Means you find the new design distracting

Thanks for letting me know what you think

Unlucky for Levi – Levi Johnston’s very public spanking

This was originally posted to JockSpank, but I think it is less likely to get lost in the archives here. This young guy gets a sore bottom AND a sore ego:

Based on the results of the JockSpank poll: “Does Levi Johnston deserve a spanking?”

Unlucky for Levi

It was an arrogant and self satisfied young jock’s worst nightmare. “This can not be happening!!” fumed a deeply miserable 21 year old Levi Johnston as he nervously glanced back over his shoulder at the brightly lit television studio, packed with cameras from a dozen TV channels, all focused on his very exposed and very tender bare bottom, as was the 500 strong, specially invited, studio audience of people he had managed to offend and upset in his short life, all grinning from ear to ear, and the positively beaming CNN TV anchor man Anderson Cooper, who was acting as host for the event.

But unlucky for Levi, it was happening

It was not supposed to be like this, when he had agreed to participate in the TV poll “Should Levi Johnston be given his own Reality TV show, or should he be spanked live on National TV?”, he never imagined for one moment that the answer would be a resounding “He should be spanked live on national TV!”.  In his swollen headed arrogance he had been so certain that the nation would go wild at the prospect of a Levi Johnston show that he had invested what was left from what he had been paid for the PlayGirl shoot and what he had made from the sale of his book “Deer in the Headlights” together with everything he could borrow, into advance merchandising, none of which would now be sold, leaving him with huge debts, all of which would have to be paid back.

As a result he had no option other than to go ahead and take the spanking in return for the paltry fee the TV studio had offered. It was either that or he would have to deal with some particularly unpleasant loan sharks, who would in all likelihood do considerably greater damage to a considerably greater number of his body parts.  At least after the spanking he would still be able to walk (and breath), if not sit down for some while.  

He couldn’t believe that the chicks would not have saved him, and what about his legion of gay fans, surely they would prefer to see him in his own reality TV show rather than getting his bare ass spanked, …… gradually the flaw in that particular argument began to dawn on him.

It hadn’t started too badly, East Coast Democrats in places like Vermont and Massachusetts, still delighted that he had pissed off Sarah Palin had voted for the reality show, but they were a rare exception not joined in any significant numbers until residents of the the crazier corners of California began to vote. Meanwhile, throughout the central fly-over states, the cry of “SPANK THE BRAT!” could be heard from sea to shining sea, growing louder as the states became redder. “Fucking Tea Party” snarled Levi under his breath.

However, the vote was by no means split on party lines, America’s demographic is changing and in many multicultural urban areas, which would usually vote solidly Democrat, people voted in droves to see the white boy get his little pink butt spanked.  Likewise, cities with large gay populations like New York, Miami and San Francisco voted for the spanking, few gays may vote Republican, or be  fans of Levi’s one time mother in law to be, but they are first and foremost gay, and they had all seen that butt in PlayGirl.  If Levi had understood the power of advertising, given his low pain threshold, he would never have risked participating in a vote where him receiving a spanking was an option after posing for all those extremely spankable bare bottom pictures, or that shower video.

When the results had come in they were devastating, and a clear indication that Levi’s high opinion of himself was not widely shared.  A gigantic 90% had voted to see him spanked, the reality show was the choice of a tiny, and primarily rather eccentric,10%.

Bad news, they say, often comes in threes, and it was certainly so for Levi, firstly some joker had stolen his clothes from his dressing room while he was taking a shower, leaving him with only a small white towel similar to that he wore in the PlayGirl shoot, to cover his young naked body.                        
Then ,when the security guards had finally dragged him to the studio, who should he see but Todd Palin wearing a huge, very smug, grin and tapping a large hairbrush against the palm of his hand.  It turned out the TV channel had asked if he would deliver the spanking, and he had waived his fee!.

Thus it was that the handsome, but very unhappy Levi Johnston, one time school hockey jock,  D list celebrity, nude model and relatively unsuccessful writer, found himself face down across the knee of his one time prospective father in law, in a network TV studio, wearing nothing but a skimpy white towel.

The towel did not provide protection for very long, as a gleeful Todd immediately reached down and firmly lifted it up revealing the very tempting target of Levi’s bare 21 year old bottom.

At that very moment seismologists with particularly sensitive equipment would have reported a slight tremor running across the nation, as, in unison, two hundred million viewers moved closer to their TV sets, had they not all been watching their own televisions or live streaming at the time.      

Levi hung his head in shame, his face glowing hot and pink with embarrassment, and with the horror of knowing his total humiliation was about to get infinitely worse.

“Good evening Todd …and .. uh.. Levi!” rasped an unusually animated Anderson Cooper “Welcome to Network TV’s one off, 90 minute, prime time event “Levi Johnston Spanked Live”

“Well Hello Anderson!” replied a cheerful Todd Palin, while a miserable, humiliated, and delightfully bare bottomed Levi just glowered silently.

“As I say, this a 90 minute live show Todd, are you up to it?” asked Anderson Cooper raising an already arched eyebrow  
 
“Don’t worry Anderson, I’ll fill that slot, with footage to spare” grinned Todd “When do I get to start?”

“When you are ready!”

Todd was more than ready and did not need to be asked twice. He immediately raised the hairbrush above his head, before bringing it down with a stinging WHACK!” on Levi’s quivering pink butt cheek, followed within nano-seconds by a ringing SWACK! across the other inviting and equally trembling butt cheek.

YAAAAOOOWWW! ….. AAAAGGGHHOOW!” yelled Levi “Stop, I’ve changed my mind!”

But there was no going back, Todd Palin was not going to stop, and the TV networks had sunk too much money into the show to let an arrogant little twerp like Levi to wriggle out of his obligations.  Levi’s protestations were ignored, he was getting spanked like it or not.

The blows continued to rain down on poor Levi’s exposed and vulnerable behind with a loud WHACK!! ….WHACK!! …SWACK! Levi was mortified, not only was he being publicly humiliated by being spanked naked, like some little kid, in front of a national TV audience of millions, plus a syndicated worldwide audience in numbers he could only guess at, but it also stung like fucking hell!!!!”

By now Todd was really enjoying himself, he was 110% straight, yet few things in his live had been quite as pleasurable as was toasting Levi Johnston’s plump little tush, it was something he had looked forward to for a very long time, and he was going to enjoy every moment, with each blow he  paying back the good looking little jerk for each slight and slur he had inflicted on the Palin family, and compensating for all the hurt the young asshole had caused. This thought reminded him of all the things the young varmit across his knee had done over the last three years and Todd continued to belabor the swiftly reddening rump with added vigur.   WHACK!! ….WHACK!! …SWACK! …WHACK!”   

Then, with one firm movement he pushed Levi further over his knee so that the lower part of the young man’s behind was uppermost enabling Todd to concentrate his assault on that sensitive area where the young jock’s perfectly formed bottom reached the upper back of his legs, an area which as Todd recalled from his own youth was particularly tender.

As Anderson Cooper watched Levi Johnston’s bare legs kicking in the air and the piston like rotation of Todd Palin’s spanking arm, he became aware of a odd, but not unpleasant sensation swelling in his lower body, which to his amazement he swiftly identified. This was most unexpected, he was a member of a particularly refined liberal social and political elite, a scion of a  socialist dynasty to the far left of the Democrat party, a debunker of birthers, a scourge of the Tea Party and, until now, a lifelong opponent of corporal punishment.  Yet, contrary to a lifetime of experience and against his better instincts, he was for the first time considering the possibility of being attracted to a Republican.

It would  take months with his analyst before he was able to determine which of the two men in front of him, and which of their respective positions, Anderson found most desirable.

Finally, Todd threw the hairbrush to the floor, however, Levi’s ordeal was far from over. A significant number of voters had chosen the supplementary option in the poll which said that Levi should be “paddled until he cried”, and Todd was determined that they should get what the voted for.

He ordered Levi to bend over and then picked up a large leather paddle.   

               
Levi’s who’s, now bright red bottom was already burning as if he had been attacked by a hundred angry hornets, looked back over his shoulder in horror at the latest agonizing instalment of his ordeal and immediately saw the bank of cameras all focused on his upturned bare bottom. He realised, with a searing  rush of embarrassment, that now his most intimate parts were on full public display.
In his horrified mind’s eye he imagined the image appearing on a hundred million TV screens across the country.

“It make no difference kid” chucked Todd Palin guessing at the cause of Levi’s reaction, “They already knew you were an asshole, they are now just seeing the evidence!!”    

With that he delivered a thunderous “TWHACK!” across the centre of Levi’s reluctantly proffered bottom, eliciting a highly satisfying yowl of distress from the miserable and bending 21 year old hunk in front of him.

The show would rank among the top ratings hits of the decades, in state after state parks and town centres were empty, as from homesteads and apartments in every city every town and every rural community could be head shouts of “SPANK THAT BRATT!” … “LET HIM HAVE IT!” …. “WHOP THAT ASS!” Followed by whoops and loud burst of applause.  With the exception of a small number  of anti-spanking campaigners, and  sundry misguided do-gooders, the vast majority agreed that the networks had rediscovered a lost art of entertainment, and in general they applauded the deal the main television channels had made with HBO and various cable channels, enabling then to change established policy, and broadcast images of male nudity at prime time.

At last the 90 minutes were over, and as Todd shook hands with with a highly impressed, and politically confused, Anderson Cooper, a naked Levi Johnston, tears running down his face jumped up and down clutching his stinging and seriously well spanked bottom.  In doing so, he unwittingly  exposed to the hungry cameras and cheering viewers that final part of his anatomy which he had kept hidden from view during his infamous PlayGirl shoot. By doing so, he ensured that his ongoing humiliation would be heightened by the endless comparisons and late night TV jokes he would be forced to endure, for months and years to come.  

As Todd watched the sobbing Levi rubbing his still cherry red bottom, which resembled nothing so much as two little ripe tomatoes, he had the satisfaction of knowing that a not only well deserved but also long lasting punishment had been inflicted.  He smiled to himself reflecting on the fact that although the sting would eventually fade from Levi’s smarting young bottom, the sting to his ego would be an unwelcome companion for years to come.

As an added bonus, Todd knew his wife would be in a very good mood that evening!!

The End          
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The results of the JockSpank poll – “Does Levi Johnston deserve a spanking, which inspired this story, can be seen in the right hand column of this blog.

Related posts
Celebrities in need of a spanking – Levi Johnston
Early poll results are bad news for Levi Johnston

Messin’ with Sasquatch : Towel Whip – What happened next?

The following commercial in the Messin’ with Sasquatch series for Jack Link’s Beef Jerky shows a dumb college jock trying to impress his girlfriend by towel whipping a Sasquatch. In the commercial the unlucky hunk pays for his stupidity by the humiliation of having his pants ripped 0ff in front of his friends and being thrown, bare butt naked, into the lake:

This leaves the question, which no doubt many fans of Sore bottomed Guys must have asked, what happened next?
After all their could be floating logs in the lake, which might make for a painful landing!!
That’s gonna be painful …..

Ouch!

Also, the Sasquatch is clearly still angry and might decide that just losing his shorts and being dunked in the lake is insufficient punishment for the arrogant young Jock’s impudence.

One appropriate punishment would be for the dumb hunk to get his bare butt soundly spanked, while wedged in the fork of a tree, so he can’t escape, as shown in the picture below:

Or can anyone else suggest better ending?

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Thanks to Ben for suggesting this idea